Thursday, May 12, 2016

Settling for the best on Mother's Day

My Mother's Day card from George read:

Happy Mother's Day from Your Husband
Honey You're the Greatest!

(Inside card sentiment) I mean would I settle for anyone but the BEST?

Conversation that ensued after opening card:

Me: “So you settled on me?”

George: “What?”

Me: “The card said you settled on me. Was I like your final chance at the wife game?”

George: “You’re kidding?”

Me: “Why are we talking in questions?”

George: “Don’t know. Do you?”

Me: “I think you’re trying to distract me from the fact you had to settle on me.”

George: “It said you were the BEST.”

Me: “The best what?”

George: “Are we still talking in questions?”

Me: “Stop trying to change the subject. What kind of best am I? The best of the ugly women you dated. The best of the bad cooks. Best of the whiners.”

George: “You're the best of everything to me. Are you happy now?”

Me: “Stop talking in questions!”

George walked out of the room mumbling. “Next year I’m settling on being out of town on business for Mother’s Day.”

Me: “I heard that.”

George: “Love you.”

Me: “Was that a question?”


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